One of the main things I am focusing on this month: NO MORE FEES.
Sounds simple enough, right?
Pay your bills on time, you won't be charged late fees.
Make sure you have money in your account, you won't be charged overdraft fees.
Etc, and so forth.
Over the past year, slowly but surely I have been setting up auto debit for most of our bills. Why slowly, you ask? Because I didn't want to give up control. At least that is what I told myself.
Confession time: What I was really doing is using money for things I wanted or thought I needed instead of using them for bills. Maybe the kids need new shoes so, I would buy them knowing the money should go towards our internet bill instead, for example.Or my husband would buy a small $30 item on Amazon. He works so hard, he deserves that small item to enjoy. I am not going to nag him about it, I'll figure out a way. I would tell myself, I'll just take care of it when we get paid again. Then when we got paid, there would be something else we needed or wanted and I might forget to pay it or just postpone it again. The bill would come with a late fee and now it's twice as much, last month plus this month! That's not really being in control, is it?
Also, more confession....This is a big one...It's good for the soul right?(deep breath) This past year I discovered that I could do a Direct Payment Advance through my bank account. That's right, since we had Direct Deposit, the bank would allow me to advance up to $500 in to my account. With a fee, of course. About $15.00 per $100.00 you advance. Notice I said "about".... talk about denial. I don't even know the exact amount. All I knew was it was cheaper than an overdraft fee of $35. You can imagine what happened next. I started out just taking $40 here, $20 there. Next thing you know it was $500 every pay period. So next time we got paid we were already in the hole $500 plus fees. And sometimes every now and then an overdraft fee too. Up until this moment today, right now when I sat down to write this blog, I have not figured out what our monthly fees have been. I just could not face it. Well, my advance payment fees and overdraft fees for January were, I am very ashamed to admit $187.50. That literally makes me sick to my stomach. What a waste and so depressing.Of all the time and effort I make to cut costs and save our family money. This is the one thing that will make the biggest difference to our bottom line. The crazy thing is I sit down and write a budget every month and then I wonder, why don't we have enough? Pure denial.
There it is. Now you know why we are on a spending freeze this month. I need to get this in check! NO MORE FEES! No more denial.
Did any of you ever watch a TV show called My Name is Earl? I thought that show was hilarious. It was about a guy down on his luck. He learns about Kharma and decides that if he wants to make his life better, he has to make a list of everyone he has wronged and go back and make things right. That was the premise of the show. It had great, colorful characters. The characters reminded me a lot of people in the little town that I grew up in. There is one episode where Earls mom, Connie comes to visit on Christmas. Earl and his ex wife are lying and pretending they are still married but they find out his mom has been lying too, keeping a secret. She has a major gambling addiction. When she finally fesses up, her big line she repeats over and over is: "Don't you judge me!" in her brash, defensive yet ashamed tone.
I consider myself a smart person. And I should know better than to let this happen. But in my desire to keep everything together, not wanting to deny my family. I have screwed up royally! I have made things worse instead of better. I was lying to myself. And I am really scared that now that I have confessed that you will judge me. Well, "Don't you judge me" I am screaming out but inside I am totally ashamed.
Sounds simple enough, right?
Pay your bills on time, you won't be charged late fees.
Make sure you have money in your account, you won't be charged overdraft fees.
Etc, and so forth.
Over the past year, slowly but surely I have been setting up auto debit for most of our bills. Why slowly, you ask? Because I didn't want to give up control. At least that is what I told myself.
Confession time: What I was really doing is using money for things I wanted or thought I needed instead of using them for bills. Maybe the kids need new shoes so, I would buy them knowing the money should go towards our internet bill instead, for example.Or my husband would buy a small $30 item on Amazon. He works so hard, he deserves that small item to enjoy. I am not going to nag him about it, I'll figure out a way. I would tell myself, I'll just take care of it when we get paid again. Then when we got paid, there would be something else we needed or wanted and I might forget to pay it or just postpone it again. The bill would come with a late fee and now it's twice as much, last month plus this month! That's not really being in control, is it?
Also, more confession....This is a big one...It's good for the soul right?(deep breath) This past year I discovered that I could do a Direct Payment Advance through my bank account. That's right, since we had Direct Deposit, the bank would allow me to advance up to $500 in to my account. With a fee, of course. About $15.00 per $100.00 you advance. Notice I said "about".... talk about denial. I don't even know the exact amount. All I knew was it was cheaper than an overdraft fee of $35. You can imagine what happened next. I started out just taking $40 here, $20 there. Next thing you know it was $500 every pay period. So next time we got paid we were already in the hole $500 plus fees. And sometimes every now and then an overdraft fee too. Up until this moment today, right now when I sat down to write this blog, I have not figured out what our monthly fees have been. I just could not face it. Well, my advance payment fees and overdraft fees for January were, I am very ashamed to admit $187.50. That literally makes me sick to my stomach. What a waste and so depressing.Of all the time and effort I make to cut costs and save our family money. This is the one thing that will make the biggest difference to our bottom line. The crazy thing is I sit down and write a budget every month and then I wonder, why don't we have enough? Pure denial.
There it is. Now you know why we are on a spending freeze this month. I need to get this in check! NO MORE FEES! No more denial.
Did any of you ever watch a TV show called My Name is Earl? I thought that show was hilarious. It was about a guy down on his luck. He learns about Kharma and decides that if he wants to make his life better, he has to make a list of everyone he has wronged and go back and make things right. That was the premise of the show. It had great, colorful characters. The characters reminded me a lot of people in the little town that I grew up in. There is one episode where Earls mom, Connie comes to visit on Christmas. Earl and his ex wife are lying and pretending they are still married but they find out his mom has been lying too, keeping a secret. She has a major gambling addiction. When she finally fesses up, her big line she repeats over and over is: "Don't you judge me!" in her brash, defensive yet ashamed tone.
I consider myself a smart person. And I should know better than to let this happen. But in my desire to keep everything together, not wanting to deny my family. I have screwed up royally! I have made things worse instead of better. I was lying to myself. And I am really scared that now that I have confessed that you will judge me. Well, "Don't you judge me" I am screaming out but inside I am totally ashamed.
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